Mommy Life

I think there comes in a time in every mother's life when she:

* Feels like taking a full body shower after changing certain diapers, despite the arsenal of wet wipes between her and the disgusting.

* Questions why her garage smells like cat poop right now?

* Desperately hopes that the 4-letter word just screeched after cutting open her thumb with a stainless steel pan isn't repeated by her 13-month old. Even if the 4-letter word is just 'crap.'

* Hates know-it-alls. And the blogs they write.

* Realizes that the cast of Golden Girls, even though 3 of the 4 have passed away, have become really good friends.

* Finds the aforementioned 'friendship' disturbing.

* Hates double ear infections but is grateful to live in a country with antibiotics when needed, as well as pain meds.

* Hates Tylenol recalls. And the grocery stores that have yet to restock their shelves.

* Is ecstatic when she can scrape the bottom of a Motrin bottle to soothe a fever-stricken 13-month old whose big blue eyes drill holes in her sappy heart.

* Wishes someone would invent an all-natural, completely safe sleeping aid for infants. Wait, did I just type that?

* Really, REALLY hates know-it-alls.

* Loves frozen bread and jarred pasta sauce on a difficult day.